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As we examine what our world today has become, one awe-inspiring question creeps to mind- was the human race created for work,
or for workahol? It's sort of like the chicken and the egg. Which I will commence to discuss as well, because I'm really hungry.
Okay, so some would say the chicken. But how did it hatch then? Nope. What about the egg? Can't have been laid by a chicken
now, can it. So another solution must be concocted- by my hypothesis, the egg was really made as an accident when dinosaurs
started coming on to land and then their babies came out along with their stomachs or something, which kind of messed them
up, so evolution took its toll and messed things around until we got the same egg that's so delicious now. And from those
eggs, the chicken that I would so like to eat right now. Mmmmm..... chickenn....
So- back to whatever I was talking about before. Ah, yes, workahol or work? Well, I suppose that one could intelligently
argue that cavemen had to make some smart, yes, INTELLIGENT and ejookaded choices to survive. This, however, is propaganda.
Humans aren't that smart! I mean, please explain to me how we were so close to being extinct that one time when Homo Sapiens
was still all in that one place in Africa. You can't. Not unless you count in - that's right - workahol. With the running
around naked and the throwing stuff at tigers and eating stuff and sleeping, cavemen must have had a very workahol-prone life.
No taxes, no debt, no paperwork, no final exams- thats a damn fine lifestyle there.
Thus, let it be known from every town and every city, every school and every factory, that we ought to have our inalienable
rights to workahol! From the time our naked caveman forefathers sat around drawing cows on cave walls, this birthright has
somehow been lost through all the stupid people who want us to work. I will not stand for it! You shouldn't either! We must
enact exculpatory legislature to remediate this horror in our society!
Now what was I yelling about again?
-Publius
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